Live Life With No Regrets!

I really admire Europeans because they emphasize quality of life, they don't spend too much time on overtime and go back to be with their families and spend summer holidays traveling or doing things they like doing.

I wonder whether the same goes for us here in Singapore.

Why work so long hours? So we can earn more money. Then why earn more money? So we can pay the bills and then be able to do the things we want to do.

So let's say we start out with a salary $3000 and then our salary doubles to $6000. Would we then spend more time with our families and doing the things we want to do? No, in fact we will spend roughly the same time at work or even more. Why? Because then our desire for more expensive things increases. Our costs increases.

So let's say our salary increases to $10000, $20000, $30000? Would we still spend more time with our families and doing the things we want to do? Surprisingly, I think that a majority of people will still spend even more time at work.

So if your earning power increases to $20000 from $10000 will you then spend only half-days at work and earn only $10000 and spend the rest of the time with your family, and enjoying your hobbies like reading, taking courses, etc.?

Of course we have to work. Work is good. And of course, there are obligations in life to fulfill, bills to pay, children to feed. However, these costs are actually very little. A salary man earning $2500 can survive just as well as someone earning twice the amount. The only thing is at what quality of life are you satisfied with? Even then, doubling the amount of money spent does not double the quality of life. Owning a $600,000 house does not mean it is double the quality of a $300,000 house, nor a $1.2 million house is quadruple. The returns diminish. And it's not just the amount we spend that determines the quality. As I stated from the beginning, quality of life is also about the amount of time spent, or care given. Being a multimillionaire and yet having a broken family is a very low quality of life.

It then comes back to what we want in life? Is it greed? The desire for more and more and more just for the sake of having more? Or is it expectations from society? That if someone pays us a very large amount of money that we are indebted to sign our souls over to him?

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I woke up this morning not feeling like exercising, in fact I stayed in bed a bit longer. But in the end I went to get my swimming trunks. I don't like the cold water being showered on me before swimming, but I still did it. And I swam for 30 minutes.

I felt better after that. That I accomplished something.

There are:

Things that I feel like doing and things that I don't feel like doing.
Things that I want to do and things that I don't want to do.
Things that I ought to do and things that I ought not to do.

Things things are not mutually inclusive nor are they mutually exclusive.

Using set theory we have 8 different combinations.

1. Feel like it, want it, and ought to do it. (This is easy to do)
2. Feel like it, want it, and ought not to do it. (Sin normally falls into this category)
3. Feel like it, don't want it, and ought to do it. (Perhaps bitter medicine to be taken)
4. Feel like it, don't want it, and ought not to do it. (Bad habits that you know are wrong)
5. Don't feel like it, want it, and ought to do it. (Work or goals we want to achieve)
6. Don't feel like it, want it, and ought not to do it. (Sins like greed, perhaps may fall into this)
7. Don't feel like it, don't want it, and ought to do it. (Personal problems, defects in character)
8. Don't feel like it, don't want it, and ought not to do it. (Easy not to do this).

Looking at the above chart, assuming that our tasks fall evenly in all 8 categories. Only 1/4 things that we have to do and not do are easy to accomplish.

The other 3/4 of tasks in life are difficult either because we don't feel like it or it's become a habit or personal defect that is preventing us from growing.

Posted by Nico at 11:25 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Besides California on Proposition 8, Arizona and Florida also voted to define marriage as between a man and a woman.

Instead of getting into a whole argument about rights, etc., I only have one question for critics of Proposition 8.

Should an incestuous brother and sister couple be allowed to marry?

Posted by Nico at 11:55 PM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

Recently, a friend of mine got entangled in a discussion on California Proposition 8 which defined marriage as between a man and woman.

Besides Christians, Muslims and Jews also supported this proposition.

Because my friend expressed his support of Proposition 8 and revealed his views on homosexuality, he was roundly pilloried for it by his pro-homosexual friends, being condemned as being intolerant and even being un-friended on Facebook.

Some of the things I learned is that people will be upset with just having a different opinion than them, so be careful about who and what you reveal to people.

However, being condemned for having a different opinion is unfair. Real discrimination is when someone denies you a seat on a bus, or refuses to give you a job, a place in university, a promotion.

To merely have a different viewpoint and being condemned for it, is the real intolerance.

Posted by Nico at 9:59 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

With a face like that on the cover of Rolling Stone magazine, who needs a makeover? I just can't imagine a dumpy old man like McCain on Rolling Stone.

I am Republican in ideology but I think that Obama represents more than just a party's policies.

Obama is also symbolic. And people also vote for symbols. Obama is perceived to be black (though he is just as much white). So he will be the first African-American to be POTUS. He also has links to Africa and Asia, his election will be a significant turning point in history.

But I think that I would vote for him not because he is symbolical, but because he does come across as politically astute, very intelligent, courteous. He distanced himself but didn't disown his own pastor despite the pastor mouthing racist sermons, he was loyal to him in spite of it. And that to me shows character.

I think that McCain got the short end of the stick from his party. They figured that it would have been difficult for a Republican to win another term. Very, very few parties hold on for more than 2 terms unless the incumbent was really popular (like Reagan). So McCain is the sacrificial lamb for this term. Republicans will probably win in 8 years time in 2016. I think that Barack should stay in power if he performs fairly competently and nothing really catastrophic happens in his first 4 years.

However, I think that people are expecting too much from him. One man in charge of the nation will still not solve the whole world's problems. Reality will set in that things are going to be tough, terrorism and the economy will still be issues and that faith in man will still disappoint.

Posted by Nico at 11:46 AM | Permalink | Comments (0) | TrackBacks (0)

I don't think people wake up in the morning deciding to be evil. Nobody wakes up in the morning thinking "Let's see how much havoc I can wreak today". (There could be one or two exceptions). But I think they do make decisions on values and identity.

They may make decisions on other people. They may decide that "People are lazy". "People are stupid", "People need guidance", "People are ignorant", "My wife doesn't understand me", "My children are a burden", "I want to show my teacher I am significant"

They may also make decisions about themselves and what they want to do about it. "I want to get pleasure in life." "I am a great seduction artist", "I am a great leader", "I am a loser", "I am a winner", "I know a lot of things".

It's from these decisions that all other decisions and attitudes follow, even if reality doesn't bear out that truth. A person who thinks he is a great boss but doesn't have the people skills that match it will encounter difficulty when things don't seem to be working out. He may then rely on outdated skills or things learned from his parents or his ex-bosses. Or a person who believes he knows a lot of things that starts boasting, yet in reality people think him over-inflated and a bore.

I don't think HItler decided to be evil one fine day. But he did decide that Jews are bad and the cause of Germany's problems. He did decide that some people's lives are worth less than the cost of maintaining them if they weren't productive.

It's these decisions that shape you and I. Thinking about it. It's all the other tiny decisions that we make, the words we say, "You're bad", "You horrid thing", "You're an asshole", "I'm never going to make it" that make us who we are.

That's why again, it comes back to what we think. Thinking good thoughts is good but deciding and believing those thoughts are true is a different matter. I can think but not believe, "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength". To believe in it is different. To think and know, "God loves me" is one thing. To believe "God loves me" is something else.

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Birthday Donor Sticker
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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Ngee Ann Student Film Shoot
Originally uploaded by nicodemus_chan.

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